MY DUEL WITH A DESK SHOWED ME GOD KNOWS BEST
by Olivia Smith
A little more than a year ago if you asked me how I felt about my life, I would have told you I was perfectly fine. I felt that God and I had a pretty stable relationship, although I probably could have highlighted some strong areas for improvement. Nothing seemed broken, so why fix it?
One Saturday evening, I jammed my toe on the corner of my desk. My foot was swollen the next day, and I was told repeatedly to get it checked, but I decided it was fine since I could walk on it. Surely, the swelling would go down, and all would be well.
During the next year, I had increasingly sharp random pains in my foot. I always attributed them to the shoes I wore, a long day, etc. Finally, I decided to see an orthopedic doctor, absolutely sure he would tell me I need to wear insoles, or some other simple remedy.
I could not have been more wrong! Apparently, during my duel with the desk, I received a hairline fracture at the top of my foot that healed improperly. I was prescribed an anti-inflammatory cream for the swelling, specific insoles since my arch had collapsed, an ankle wrap, and a very annoying brace to correct my new, slightly irregular gait.
It couldn’t have been worse timing, as it was now the last week of May 2014. A lot had changed in my life. I’d become the Youth Ministries leader at my church, and I was looking forward to Pathfinder Red Zone the next weekend.
One evening during that program, I retired early because of my aching foot. Lying in bed, I started thinking about the amazing youth with whom I work and recent projects I’d undertaken, such as starting a new catering business and reaching the halfway point of working on a master’s degree.
Suddenly, it dawned on me that if I had continued on the path I was going a year ago, I absolutely would not have been able to do any of these things. I was content with my life, but those areas of needed improvement had started to grow and cause the “stable” relationship I had with God to weaken. I was not putting 100% into anything but was okay with doing just enough to get by in every aspect of my life. My character and spiritual walk needed molding, and events of the past year taught me some real life lessons:
Like the injury I received—when we go off God’s path for us, we will get hurt, but still think we’re good.
Like the sharp random pains—God tugs and begs us to come back to Him, but our stubbornness and sinfulness resists.
Like this new brace—coming back might hurt a bit, because it usually means learning, understanding, healing, restoration, and maybe even forgiving.
Now, looking back, I can see where God allowed a small thing like my duel with a desk to change my life for the best.